Love myself
Well, I decided... I need to love myself more.
Boy is still talking to me. He's behaving like nothing is happening... I am going for some counselling... I think I should make myself happy, with or without Boy.
A cute guy told me that in a relationship, trust is very important. We should, as much as possible, try to believe in our partner and reduce our suspicion... Well... I got a feeling if I go for counselling, I will be told that as well!...
Maybe Boy is also tired from hearing me suspecting him... Maybe he really didn't do anything... Maybe he did and was so guilty or tired of hiding from me because he knew I will be extremely upset if I know. Whatever it is, I think I should no longer dwell on this issue.
I want to be myself. I want to make myself happy...
So, since my back and shoulders are aching like mad and I found the old receipts of Wa***Spa, allowing me to get a free footscrub, I decided to treat myself to a scrub and a massage. Sh*t! should not have gone there! The regular masseur I always called for was not in and the new guy asked me for 'tips'... And his strokes are not as hard. Also, the free footscrub I was supposed to get was so crappy... I left the spa still with aching back and shoulders and worse, I left horny!!...
What a way to try to make myself happy! I wanted to relax and enjoy myself, I ended up more frustrated!...
*Sheesh*...
Labels: Boy
posted by Buaya @ 2:11 PM
4 Comments:
Hi,
Glad to hear you're going to start doing something to make yourself happy. I've had my ups and downs with my bf too - it's tough. We do give each other a lot of freedom,we have our own set of frens,we have our own programs and we have learned to just trust each other. It's of course easier said then done but it is possible.
All the best.
Thanks... I would like to trust him but the way he behaves... Anyway, there's really no point behaving like previously... This could jolly well be the answer...
Wel, if I were in your shoes, I will probably be adopting the following approach:
a) continue the relationship the way it is now
b) go for occasional massage (with extras thrown in)
c) go one of the sauna like 1-2 times per month
it's not the best solution but it does help relief the physical side of the relationship. the thing is must ALWAYs make sure that people I meet for (b) and (c) will NEVER have opportunity to develop into anything more.
very selfish/ delusional thinking right!
Hmm... That is what I am intending to do now... :p
Delusional, yes... Selfish? Maybe he's also doing so but was afraid of letting me know? He know I can be very upset. The last time I found out, I was extremely upset...
But it should be the best way out... As of now!...
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